The next generation is WEIRD. Cute. Sweet. Super Awesome. But WEIRD

I'm pretty sure that my kids were hatched on a spaceship somewhere and transplanted into my home. They do the most BIZARRE things.

Evidences #1, #2 and #3: Frugality
These kids are just plain strange. The first hint I had of this was when they begged me, BEGGED me to bring lunch from home. Huh? Yeah- I would have DIED to have school lunch when I was a kid. Warm bologna sammich and slightly-less-warm milk in my thermos? No THANK YOU. But no. MY kids want to take home lunch so badly that it almost reduces them to tears. And I know for a fact that school lunch isn't bad. It's not like mystery meat and lumpy potatoes with unidentifiable goo on them. They get GOOD lunches. Then, when we can't find their lunch boxes anywhere, do they say "Well, I guess we'll just have to have the pizza and chocolate milk the school is providing tomorrow"? No way, man. They said "It's okay. We'll just take it in a Wal-Mart bag. No big deal." Seriously. I am not even kidding you. I think I had to pick my jaw up off the floor. Yeah. They're nuts.
Another proof that my kids are extra-terrestrials, posing and adorable blond children is this: Jake came home from school the other day with a big rip in the knee of his jeans. Of course I told him that if he was going to keep tearing up his jeans, he'd have to start buying his own. To which he replied, "Oh, it's okay mom. We can just patch it." WHAT?! You want to go out in public with patched denims?? I had to lie down for a bit after that.
Over Presidents Day weekend, we got up late one morning. The kids were trying to decide what to have for breakfast and settled on cold cereal- I've been making them eat heart-healthy oatmeal every morning... I think that's getting old. :) Anyway, *bad news* we didn't have any milk. So I offered freezer waffles instead. They weren't having any of THAT! I was promptly informed that they could just make do with CANNED MILK. No joke. Again, I would rather have gone without food ALL DAY, as a kid, than eat my cereal with reconstituted canned milk. Where have these kids come from???

Evidence #4: Diet
Aside from their now near-Pavlovian avoidance of oatmeal, I have never seen kids eat as healthy as mine, at least, not voluntarily*. They constantly have fruit in their hands (actually eating it). I try to keep a good on-hand supply of apples, oranges and bananas around, and if I ever run out... well, you'd think the world was coming to an end! And if I bring home "special" fruits- like clementines or grapes or *GASP* strawberries(!!!)- I'm nominated for Best Mom in the UNIVERSE. Smoothies are like the Nectar of the Gods. It's not just fruit either. I don't understand it, really. When I was a kid there were only 4 kinds of veggies I would eat (corn, peas, green beans and carrots) and even those would make me gag involuntarily. These kids FIGHT- yes, you read that right, they FIGHT- over who gets the last few pieces of broccoli or cauliflower in the bowl. You'd think it was brownie batter or something. They have SECONDS of salad, and only eat half their lasagna. Carrot sticks? They'll cart the bag all around the house munching on them and I find little orange bits in my bed, in the bathroom, under the couch cushions.
*This particular quirk, I'm afraid, does not apply to Spencer- only Jake, Aspen and Hannah. Spencer will only eat cheeseburgers, quesadillas, egg burritos and fruit snacks. He would go for DAYS without food (if I'd let him) rather than eat anything else. If you get anywhere near him with anything that was once a living plant, he runs screaming. Except for bananas and smoothies... he likes those. Even the promise of that dream-of-all-dreams (Sherbet Push-Ups) will not entice that child to eat anything else. I've resorted to sneaking healthier stuff into what he will eat, a la The Sneaky Chef. At least he likes chewable vitamins. If he didn't, I'd be in trouble. That kid is STUBBORN... I wonder where he gets that from...

Evidence #4: Cleanliness
Okay- so Spencer is the only one who seems to exhibit THIS particular trait, but it still seems weird. I used to have to chase my little brothers around with a garden hose and a bar of soap to get them clean. He'll just decide, AT LEAST once a day, that he needs a shower. He'll turn it on, get undressed and just hop right in. ALL BY HIMSELF (Obviously, I supervise him- just felt I should throw that out there.) without any coaxing from me. Clearly some kind of Vulcan personality flaw or something.

So. What do you think? Is this incontrovertible evidence that my kids are aliens or what? Where the heck is Mulder when you need him?

HAHAHAHAHAHA..... AHAHAHA!

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Funny kids

Aspen was telling us all a story in the car the other day that had to do with passing gas in class. :) In the interest of tact, I won't share the whole story, just these two quotes: "My friend Elrich said that girls don't [pass gas]", and at the end; "That is one of the most disturbing things I've ever done."

Ah, that girl cracks me up. Just before she started school, she would say things like "Well, there are ants EVERYWHERE in the world. Except China and Egypt." Once, I was making eggs, and I always put salt and pepper on them. Aspen, for some reason, thought that was totally strange and was complaining about it. I said that lots of people put pepper on their eggs, and she responded with "Except in China and France."

Until just recently, she and Jake both thought that people still rode horses in Texas and that they don't have cars there. :)

I think it must be a wonderful world that exists in the minds of my children. I wish I could see it for myself.

Just adding a button here for the NieNie book! Check it out:

Last one, I swear

Well, for this week at least.

 

Spencer, Hannah and I visited stopped by and said “hi” to Duke at work today. In the car on the way home, Spencer asked me what Duke had said to me when they weren’t listening. I told him that he’d said that he loves me and gave me a kiss.

Spencer: “Mom, why does Dad love you?”

Me: (trying to be modest) “Oh, I don’t know. Probably lots of reasons.”

Hannah: (from the back of the van) “Because her is the BOSS, Spence.” *At this point I’m trying as hard as I can not to laugh out loud.

Spencer: “Psh. (yes- he really says “psh”. Precocious little stinker.) I know why he loves you, Mom.”

Me: “Why?”

Spencer: “Because you’re his life.”

 

AWWWWWWWWWWW!!!! That kid is awesome sometimes. So then I had to figure out what he meant by “life”…

 

Me: “Oh? I’m his life? What does that mean?”

Spencer: “That he loves you. I read about lifes. I know.”

Me: “Really? Where?”

Spencer: “From you.”

 

*Shrug* I’m still having a little trouble deciphering the life thing. Either way, Spencer frequently says the most profound things. What a great kid I have. : )

More Monkey-isms and Happy New Year!

I have to record these adorable conversations somewhere, and where better than my blog where I can foist them on an unsuspecting public?? Right?

So the other day, we had just dropped Duke off at work when Hannah piped up from the back of the van.
"Mom, you know who I miss?"
"Who do you miss?"
"I miss Jacob."
"Yeah. I miss Jacob, too."
"When he gets home I'm going to hug him and hug him and hug him and hug him and hug him and hug him and hug him and tell him I love you, Jacob."
"Me, too, kiddo."

I wasn't sure if she was going to move past the hugging idea for a while. :) Poor Jake gets ambushed when he gets back from visits to Alaska. We all miss him terribly.

Also, a quick Spencer story. He got a hat from my parents for Christmas- it is SO awesome... I can't find a picture of it online, but it's a grey beanie with a Jack Skellington face on the front and these awesome felt dreadlocks sprouting from the top. Seriously, no description will do it justice. It's just too... AWESOME. Anyway- he went out with Duke today to pick up his name-draw gift for Jake for our Christmas Part Deux, and they went to Duke's store while they were out. When they got back I asked Spence if anyone had liked his hat. He said, "Oh yeah. Someone really liked it." When I asked him who he shrugged and said "Someone I don't know." Maybe that's only funny to me... I don't know. That kid has the funniest mannerisms, though. I love him.


I hope everyone had a good New Years Eve! We had a pretty good time at my mom's house. I made my Chicken Bacon Croissant Braid (a recipe which I *kinda* came up with on my own) and we had all our traditional snackage, including little Smokies, Chex Party Mix and Martinelli's. We even had poppers. Sad story though- we almost slept through the Ball Drop! lol After a bit the kids started getting a little wired (as expected), so we took them downstairs to put them to sleep (again, as we had planned). What we didn't plan on though, was falling asleep with them! :) I woke up about a quarter past 11 and made it back upstairs for some of the party, but I wasn't sure Duke was going to make it at all. Sure enough, four minutes to 12 he came staggering up the stairs just in time to count down and give me a New Years kiss, just in the *TA-DA* nick of time. What a guy!

I'm STILL wondering where the time went, but I'm looking forward to 2009 with high hopes. Instead of looking back at 2008, here's a look at the playbill for '09.

Coming soon, to a Jones Family near you: (drumroll please...)

*January: My first semester in college
*February: Aspen's 7th birthday
*May: Our 6th wedding anniversary and
Spencer's 5th birthday
*July: Hannah's 4th birthday
*August: Spencer's first day of Kindergarten and
My (gasp) 28th birthday
*September: The 3rd anniversary of our sealing
Duke's 29th birthday (hehehehe... one more year 'til the headstone comes out of retirement)
*October: Jacob's 10th birthday (can you believe it?!?!)
And about a million other things that I'm sure will be newsworthy enough for me to post about.

I figuratively raise my glass of sparkling cider to each one of you, and wish you all the best that 2009 has to bring you. Hope you have a GREAT year.

Also, a follow up on Christmas

Can’t believe if forgot the obligatory Christmas blog. :  )

We got to do a lot of fun things this season, despite our crazy hectic schedules. Seriously, 2 retail jobs, plus the holiday season equals nutso. But anyway- once we got the van (again, a BIG thank you to the Graham family and to Brent!) we took the kids out to the Festival of Lights here in town. I might be a little biased, but I think we have the best one around. It’s become a bit of a tradition for us to go at least once a year. It’s the same every year, but it’s still fun every time.

We also went to our ward Christmas party- Jake’s choice- and I’m sure glad we went! What a riot! Each auxiliary put on their own number for the entertainment, and I think the clear winner (if it were a contest) would be the Young Men. Holy cow. Those guys are funny. They did a series of lip synching/skits to Inside Out’s Snowman song. The newer, MUCH longer version. Everyone was just rolling in the aisles. My hat is off to them, and their leaders (who also performed). They made the night. Then the Young Women and their leaders lead us all in The Twelve Days Of Christmas. The fun part was that there were 12 tables (we had dinner before the show) and each table had to act out their assigned verse in the song. : ) We had “3 french hens”. It was too good. And the best part was watching the Bishopric act out “a partridge in a pear tree” 13 times.

The Saturday before Christmas we took Jake to the airport and then went to see the lights at Temple Square- which has also become a bit of a tradition. I think that this was the COLDEST visit to Temple Square we’ve EVER “enjoyed”. : ) Because of that, it was also the FASTEST visit ever. : ) I think it went something like this. “OOH, wow! Look at the candles on the reflection pool! And the nativity! Okay, moving on! See the lights! So pretty! Next! Okay, let’s stand here and try not to freeze for a minute while we listen to the Christmas story….. Wow! That was great! Who wants hot chocolate? Okay! Let’s get out of here.” It was COLD, COLD, COLD. Heather came with us, and I always wonder if she’s just a glutton for punishment every time she comes on our family outings. : ) As always, though, it’s great to spend time with her. After Temple Square we all went to Village Inn for some truly terrible hot chocolate and a bite to eat. Ah, memories. : )

Throughout the season we’ve taken a few opportunities to talk to the kids about why we celebrate Christmas and what it really means. These teaching moments apparently didn’t quite sink in, as evidenced by the conversation I had in the car with the kids on Christmas Eve day. It went something like this:

“So, guys, what’s tomorrow?”

(in unison) “CHRISTMAS!!!”

“Yes! It’s Christmas! Why do we have Christmas?”

*crickets*

“Whose birthday are we celebrating?”

Spencer: “Hannah’s!”

“No… not Hannah’s… whose birthday do we celebrate on Christmas?”

Hannah: “Aspen’s!!”

“No. Guys… look at this picture. Who is in it?” (Me holding up a picture of Jesus that Hannah received from her nursery leaders)

Aspen: “Jesus! It’s Jesus’ birthday!”

(huge sigh of relief) “Yes! That’s it. We’re celebrating Jesus’ birth. Isn’t that great?”

Spencer: “Mom… if it’s Jesus’ birthday, when is he coming over??”

I love that kid.

As for Christmas, we had a wonderful day! It was only Part One of Christmas, Part Deux coming when Jake gets home, but we had a kick. It was actually nice to have a quiet-ish Christmas. And I got a nap! Woohoo! Afterward, we all went over to my mom’s and had dinner and played on the Wii for a few hours.

The gifts this year seemed to have themes to them. Hannah got all princess/pretend stuff- the big hits being a tea set and a trunk of dress-up clothes. Spencer got cars, and Iron Man toys. The boy was in HEAVEN. J And Aspen got all art and learning stuff- her faves? A well stocked art tub and an indoor/outdoor microscope. That thing is pretty awesome, too. It’s magnified 40x and comes with a lanyard so she can take it out side. I have to thank the girls at Funfinity for that little gem. I love that place.

Also, I did in fact get fab pumps to go with my fab dress and I think I’m picking up a vacuum tomorrow. Yay!! Duke insisted on not getting any gifts this year, but I did pick up a sweet bowie knife that he’d been wanting.

When Jake gets back we’re going to have a family home evening about giving gifts to the Savior, since we’re celebrating His birthday. Our Home Teachers gave a great lesson about this a couple Sundays ago and I really loved it. We plan on following up on that in June or July to see how we’re doing and remind ourselves of the gifts we choose to give Him, like being nice to our brothers and sisters, or forgiving others, or reading our scriptures more often. I like this idea much more than just plain old New Years Resolutions. I think they mean more when they’re kind of consecrated like that. So, we’ll see how that goes, and we’ll let you all know. : )

I hope you all had great Christmases, and I wish you all very Happy New Years! (again…) : )